First Class Comes With a Little Redemption

As some of you may remember from my last X-Men rant, I was more than reluctant to watch the latest installment in the Hollywood version of the mutant team. After the travesty of the third X-Men, Wolverine Origins came along, and I was also a little gun-shy about Hollywood destroying yet another beloved character (RIP Phoenix), but let's face it; watching Hugh Jackman's interpretation of Logan is both enjoyable and dreamy. Sure Sabretooth was never really established as Wolverine's bro, but they weren't bros for realsies. One comic establishes Wolvie's arch nemesis as his father. "Logan, I am your faaaaaasha!"

I don't necessarily mind when a film takes certain liberties, shift happens. As we all know, there are splinters in the comic verse, but it's when the very core of what makes a comic book character really interesting and legen-------dairy is completely altered that results in the most epic of fails. Phoenix explained as a split personality = epic fail. 

X-Men First Class, despite portraying Havok as a founding member of X-Men despite being the younger brother of Cyclops and later joining X-Men after his brother in the comic-verse; I digress—was pretty effing schweet! This latest mutant flick focuses on the bro-mance between a younger Professor X and Magneto.  They were in college and ya know, did some experimenting. The audience catches a deeper glimpse at the origin of their iconic chess games and banter depicted in the first two X-Men movies (notice how I only include the first two films). The story is told through this relationship as well as the relationship of some other mutant pairs.There are some playful cameos throughout, and the storytelling stays true to the nature of the characters introduced to many by the comic-verse, which makes it all worth it in the end.

                                                                   

The hottest new club...

While Saturday Night Live's skits can be inconsistent and you never really know what you're going to get; some send you into fits of hysteria, while others just leave you feeling meh. Throughout the seasons and casts, Weekend Update was always one of my SNL highlights. I enjoy the current host, Seth Meyers and find his Weekend Updates delightful, but I light up when I realize it's a Weekend Update that features a certain lovable city correspondent.     

                                                                                                                                       

(1)Some argue that Stefan is homophobic and perhaps he is; he's definitely not known for saying the most politically correct things. (2)Bill Hader explained to Jimmy Kimmel that the character was a combination of a barista with similar mannerisms and vocal inflections as the character Stefan and an email writer John Mulaney received about a gay bar that had a laundry list of features. A gay bar that prides itself on the many amenities and attractions it has to offer? WHA????

(3)Take the following descriptions of some of the hottest gay clubs in New York City:

Mingle with a pretty and diverse gay crowd at this hot nightspot in Hell’s Kitchen. The huge two-level lounge is a former warehouse (and whorehouse). Enjoy therapeutic cocktails named after your favorite disorders – from Delusions to Psychotic Episodes. Free entertainment includes an open-mike night, a comedy hour featuring queer-friendly comedians, and nightly DJs.

At Eastern Bloc, the drinks are strong and (relatively) cheap, bears are beautiful, and the house assumes no attitude. The decor is early Communist nostalgia and DJ Josh Sparber runs the show at the Good Times parties on Wednesday night, where it's easy to strike up a conversation with a bearded stranger.

Stefan's portrayal seems pretty accurate when you take these factors into consideration. So, O.K. Stefan is a bit of an exaggeration, but come on! That’s what makes him so funny! Some of the stuff the writers have him saying is so outlandish, Hader can barely keep a straight face and often breaks character as he bursts out laughing at the absurdity. I can see how some may find him offensive, but shit is funny; I don’t care who you are...

With Stefan’s backstory and origin in mind along with the satirical nature of both the show and the performance, I would say the knee-jerk reaction to cry homophobic may be a bit pre-mature on this one. I would hope the majority of American audiences can distinguish between realistic performances and satire. There once was a time when the sole purpose of a homosexual character on a television series or the big screen was to be THE comic relief—the idiot or the bafoon. We’ve come a long way baby! There are a multitude of characters, and these characters showcase a multitude of backgrounds and a much more complex archetypal schematic for the "gay character". With this broader exposure, I'd like to believe the majority of audiences fully understand characters on SNL do not serve to represent the whole nor encourage hasty generalizations. Are there some who will come to the myopic conclusion that Stefan is "just like the rest of em"? Yes, but those folks will always be around. Upon each generation, shiny and new douche-nozzles shall arise! One thing is certain; progress has been made. Let's not pick on poor Stefan as if he is standing in the way of it.

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1. Stefan on SNL is Disturbingly Homophobic,” (The Data Lounge, December 21, 2010). http://www.datalounge.com/cgi-bin/iowa/ajax.html?t=9965549#page:showThread,9965549 (September, 6, 2011).

2. “Bill Hader Explains the Origin of ‘Stefan’ on Fallon,” Huffington Post, November 25, 2010. http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/11/27/bill-hader-jimmy-fallon-snl_n_788746.html (September 6, 2011).

3. “Top 6 New York City Gay Bars,” (About.com). http://manhattan.about.com/od/glbtscene/tp/nycgaybars.htm (September 6, 2011).

Hiking Adventures with Underground Dude and Minnesota Gal

I enjoy hiking. I really do. Some might even call me a pretty earthy kind of dude. However, I have learned recently that preparation is key to a successful hiking trip. O.K. who am I kidding, my last hiking trip was absolutely delightful, but for an entirely different set of reasons than the usual giddiness that hiking brings out in me.

Words cannot even describe how delightful it was to have a former teammate from the college years and one of my closest friends find her way out west. We decided to go exploring one day, and I knew of a place that was rumored to have a spectacular view of the city, but had never actually been.

Lovely, what a delightful way to spend an afternoon; an afternoon spent driving up a mountain road and casually pulling over to check out the scenic views as we make our way to the top.

We should have probably been a bit more thorough with our research...

We make our way to the top end of the mountain road, and notice there is a fee to get into this so called mountain park...peculiar.

We gladly pay, very proud of ourselves, because the view will so be worth it. We park. We then step out of the vehicle...wait a minute...there is still clearly a lot of mountain ahead of us, and there is no view at all...

We notice a few trails and realize we were given a handy dandy trail guide by the gatekeeper to the park after we paid our fee. We open it up and the first thing we notice is:

"Easy Trail-1 1/2-3 hours"

MG: Oofta! (from Minnesota)

UD: That's the easy trail eh? (likes to pretend he's from Canada)

MG: I enjoy hiking...when I know I am going to be hiking. I guess we can try it out and see how far we make it. 

UD: I'm wearing dress shoes...

MG: I have these stylish sandals (holds foot out daintily admiring her sandals for their cuteness), but I should probably go with my flats. She proceeds to pull out a pair of slip on flimsy yet flowery flats from her purse and changes shoes.

As we make our way up the trail, there are others coming down the trail with the look and smell of victory. They clearly had made it to the top. A woman who was perspiring profusely was donning a hefty pack loaded with bottles of water on each side and sporting some pretty sturdy hiking boots, which totally clashed with the rest of her ensemble—just sayin. Her companion was a male utilizing two metal walking sticks that resembled ski-poles to which I thought to myself: how embarrassed was he when he got to the top and discovered there was no snow to be found? These folks were hardcore and the looks they gave us...oh the looks that we got! I am fairly certain I heard the ski-pole man scoff "noobs" as he passed by us on the trail. 

We were definitely the odd couple on the mountain that day:

• A dude in a fashionable pair of jeans (strictly aesthetic rather than practical) and dress shoes. 

• A Minnesota gal delicately trying to find her footing as we navigate the trail. 

• No water whatsoever...

About 5 minutes up the trail:

UD: OMG! OMG! STOP! STOP!

MG: What!? What is it?

UD: SNAKE! HUGE SNAKE! OMG SNAKE!

The snake proceeds to slither off the trail as Minnesota Gal glimpses the tail of the vile creature. 

MG: Ohhh my! My ankles are not protected; maybe we should head back. 

UD: I am really wishing I had one of those ski-poles right about now. I bet they make awesome weapons. 

So, we didn't make it to the top of the mountain, but it was a hiking trip of awesomeness I will never forget. As soon as we got back in the car hilarity ensued and we had ourselves a good laugh. And hey, the trip wasn't totally wasted either; there were some turnouts on the mountain road from time to time for the "noobs" to take pictures.

The Situation is Grim...

I can see why millions tune in to Jersey Shore. I do, I get it. Curiosity. When I heard there were people on the show with names like "Snookie" and "The Situation", I too was intrigued and thought to myself: This has got to be a magical show with epic storytelling that involves rainbows and unicorns of some kind. I was wrong...

What I can't understand is why people keep watching. On the other hand, it was an inspiration for one of my favorite episodes of Bones thus far. So, for that I am grateful for the existence of Jersey Shore. 

"This is called the crab; it will intimidate him!"

I suppose in some form or another we are all slaves to the machines!

DISCUSS

This is where I live

THE PROS

I am super close to the Rocky Mountain Range! 

The Wildlife!

THE CONS

The Weather

The Crazies!

Info-graphics are gay

And by gay I mean AWESOME! See what I did there, RECLAIMED! HUZZAH! As you may or may not know from a previous post, I heart info-graphics! I came across this, and it totally made me LAWL.

http://ilovecharts.tumblr.com/

Flatulence and fart babies...

So, a fellow blog buddy was inviting us to join a debate with the topics of her choosing and allow us to duke it out two by two. I was all set to go head to head on the topic I was given (admittedly, I didn't really stand a chance considering my first attempt was pro rather than the con I was assigned). However, I will never know. I went to attempt to sway myself from the opinion, I so convincingly convinced myself of the first time around (a daunting task on its own) when I discovered there would be no epic battle or debate as some of her followers took offense. Tis a shame.

Needless to say, I am going to post my original argument (the pro) as I never really got around to the con. It's been kind of busy this last week and a half, and I will probably not be posting in a while until this conference I've been working on is over. I can't wait. So, to my sparring partner, if you happen to read this post,  you will discover that I pretty much concede to you and your pro argument as well. I couldn't really convince myself of the cons because I did such a good job arguing for the pro...lawl.

My topic? FLATULENCE!

This is an interesting topic to tackle, and I find myself conflicted on this issue. There’s a part of me that still giggles at fart jokes and let’s face it, when you have the power to clear out a room with a single poof, there’s a part of you that’s kind of proud. There are also those moments when you’ve been holding it in all day, for professional reasons, and the sweet release at the end of the day really brings about a sense of accomplishment and relief all bundled up in one gaseous ball of joy. There are also those low grumbly movements of gas and when released, it’s quite amusing to look around questionably with a slight look of fear in the eyes and simply state, bear?!

I suppose the real issue lies in the fact romantic partners may not find flatulence quite so entertaining nor take part in your celebrations of achievement. My mother once told me her farts smelled like roses, so there was no need to scoff when she was unable to hold in her “delicate bundles of gas,” and this was seriously what she called her farts; truth-fact. When I offered this explanation to one of my partners at their disdain of my outward expression of my flatulence and the sense of accomplishment that naturally came with it; they were not amused and proceeded to give me the stink-eye. There are definitely those moments where even my own eyes would water at the stench and vileness, but part of me is still pretty impressed at how fast a room empties out. These usually bring up comments like, “what did you have to eat today!?!?” or even “You should really get that checked out!” The second comment/question got me thinking how would that conversation go with your doctor? A little research revealed that these conversations actually do take place!

Doctor: How long have you noticed a problem with flatulence?

Underground Dude: Well, I think problem is kind of a strong word. Don’t you? It is, after-all, a natural bodily function. Quite frankly, I think the actual problem lies in the fact we’re not willing to talk or dialogue about it. We’re so quick to exit the room when it comes up―well, I suppose that terminology isn't really accurate―so, when it comes out the bum we should embrace flatulence rather than fear it.

Doctor: What about the frequency and volume of flatus?

Underground Dude: I don’t know maybe about a dozen times a day. I count the bigger more impressive ones twice though.

Doctor: That sounds about normal. Do you swallow air often?

Underground Dude: What!?

Doctor: Swallowed air is the major source of gas in the upper gastrointestinal tract. In most cases of excessive belching and excessive flatulence there is no underlying pathology and the situation probably represents an acquired habit.

Underground Dude: Wait a minute, you’re telling me I can swallow air and this would induce my very own fart babies? Air is unscented; therefore, these fart babies would be unscented. OR, what if I were to swallow air whilst spraying a minty fresh mist or even a rose flavored spray. MY GOD! My mother very well may have had rose scented gas…IT IS POSSIBLE!

Doctor: That’s not quite where I was going with that, you see—

Underground Dude: That’s all I needed to know Doc! I think you may have just saved my love life!

So, now I can still entertain myself and giggle at flatulence without offending my future romantic prospect or mate’s sense of smell!

Alright, alright. Maybe not; However, the time in a relationship when both parties are so comfortable with each other that it’s o.k. to let one go and it doesn’t signal the end of the world/relationship. When that sweet yet bitter release comes without severe repercussion (sure, they may scowl at some of your gas products that come with a particular vile stench, but there is always laughter to follow); it's a beautiful thing. It’s even more beautiful when you’re so comfortable, you engage in a competition to see who can have the cutest fart baby.

Where did all the hipsters come from?

I‘m sipping a scummy pint of cloudy beer in the back of a trendy dive bar turned nightclub in the heart of the city’s heroin district. In front of me stand a gang of hippiesh grunge-punk types, who crowd around each other and collectively scoff at the smoking laws by sneaking puffs of "fuck-you," reveling in their perceived rebellion as the haggard, staggering staff look on without the slightest concern.
                                                                   ---Douglas Haddow


I'm not entirely sure how to feel about this whole hipster movement. I live in a location where fashion and trends tend to be a little out-dated and behind; non-mainstream. Also, a lot of the locals here are pretty damn annoying at times and it seems that hipsters are annoying a lot of people these days. So, does this mean I live in a community full of hipsters? Considering 90% of the town give in to the commodification of the "Old Wild West" donning western gear for only a week and a half out of the year. I'm gonna say NOT.

Now, I'm a big fan of Independent artists when it comes to my music taste. As far as fashion goes, I'd like to claim I have my own style, and I was giving it to the man by deviating from all that is trendy. Even at a young age, my mother was buying me Hilfiger, and I refused to wear it. Does this mean that I'm a hipster? GASP!

The truth is though, I buy and wear what I think I'll look "cute" in. Let's face it, Hilfiger did nothing for my hips. The fact that a piece of wardrobe looks unique does appeal to me, but I ask myself, "Can I really pull this off." Sometimes, I probably don't. In these instances, I would hope my friends gave me a good sit-down "FACE IT" session. So, I would say while I am a pretty groovy dude, a hipster I am not. I love argyle way too much and happily give in to this trend.

According to Douglas Haddow of Adbusters, "after punk was plasticized and hip hop lost its impetus for social change, all of the formerly dominant streams of 'counter-culture' have merged together. Now, one mutating, trans-Atlantic melting pot of styles, tastes and behavior has come to define the generally indefinable idea of the 'Hipster.' "

I am a huge fan of mutants, so that's a point for the hipster side.

Click to see Mutant Hipsters

Unfortunately, I like my mutants to be bad-ass and not pretentious little frackers, so point taken back.

Sidenote: The comic book geek in me feels the need to point out that Juggernaut clearly has his helmet on and the whole purpose of his helmet is to prevent his bro, Xavier, from projecting or reading his thoughts. While this video is both hilarious and brilliant, there is that little discrepancy that no one probably cares about...

I could appreciate the notion that hipsters refuse to follow trends and go outside the "stylish" garb that all the tweens and metrosexuals are currently drooling over. However, that appreciation quickly dwindled when one of my good friends came up with a fun and exciting new game to play while roaming the streets of any urban city of your choice. 

While this game is super fun, it appears to me that the hipsters seem to be the butt of a lot of jokes and the object for a lot of disdain. Perhaps it's the idea that they want to go against everything that is mainstream, yet have created a trend that has become both mainstream and homogeneous. Hmmmm, this seems to go against everything the hipsters claim they are...maybe I just don't understand.

Again, I think Haddow says it best: "We are a lost generation, desperately clinging to anything that feels real, but too afraid to become it ourselves. We are a defeated generation, resigned to the hypocrisy of those before us, who once sang songs of rebellion and now sell them back to us. We are the last generation, a culmination of all previous things, destroyed by the vapidity that surrounds us. The hipster represents the end of Western civilization – a culture so detached and disconnected that it has stopped giving birth to anything new."